I realised half way through my life that I was born into a family that showed very limited emotions. With very little empathy, if any, from all members of the family. But I am full of empathy and compassion and I have always felt out of place in my family. Having been born at home, I knew for a very long time I was in the right but wrong.

35 years ago I started to learn about what true emotions are and what they mean to me. I have always felt emotions before I even knew they where happening. Recently I found a TV programme – Heartland – from Canada that has taught me what families should be like.

I know I am born into a family to enable me to learn the lessons that I needed to learn.

The character Amy Fleming showed me what empathy and compassion really feels like. It also helped she was female. As all the females I have ever met, to this date, reinforce what I was born into. But having successfully learnt my life lessons. I get to see what I have always been missing. Seeing a female that shows empathy and compassion, not only for horses but also humans lol.

When the sad events or the loving events crop up in the show I react automatically. It has been a great lesson on what I always thought was how life should really feels like for me. I have been living with mixed feelings the whole of my life.

Now I know what type of feelings I prefer to feel. And it was not the family I was born into. I have to create a whole new life that is right for me. So it attracted the right female energy.